Endurance Mindset

Category: Life Learnings

  • Pain is a Biased Teacher: Why Learning the Hard Way Isn’t Always the Right Way

    Pain is a Biased Teacher: Why Learning the Hard Way Isn’t Always the Right Way

    Most people flinch at discomfort. The great ones lean in. Pain isn’t a stop sign, it’s proof you’re getting somewhere. Excellence isn’t talent; it’s tolerance. If you can crave what others avoid, you gain an edge no algorithm can replicate.

    Nobody likes being wrong, but error is a faster path to growth than perfection. We say “failure teaches,” but don’t act like it. We avoid it, rationalize it, try to outsource it. Here’s the truth: if you’re not failing, you’re not trying hard enough. The key is learning from it faster than others.

    Some lessons hurt more than others. I broke my body chasing performance, literally. My immune system went into overdrive. My takeaway? “Moderation or die.” It felt wise. It helped me heal. But four years later, that same mindset held me back. I passed up chances I should’ve taken. Pain taught me, but it also lied.

    That’s the problem with deep scars, they leave permanent edits on your map. As a coach, I wanted to spare others that pain and I try to teach them lessons on a “smaller scale”. For example if they forgot to fuel a long workout correctly in the winter that’s cool and they have enough time to fix that and learn how to do it right, till the big races in the summer come around.  That worked until it didn’t. Some never learned to course correct on their own.

    At some point, you realize: you can’t walk the path for someone else. Even if you see the wall coming, they need to crash into it. It’s how humans grow. Parents know this. Lovers, too. Wisdom doesn’t transfer easily. Only pain does.

    But here’s the fun part: when we finally do learn, we often overcorrect. We mistake the intensity of the last failure for a universal truth. We build rules that hold us down. “Never push that hard again.” “Always play it safe.” And suddenly, the lesson that was supposed to make us better becomes a prison.

    So how do we get better at failing? Iterate. Bounce off the edges of your box. Test the walls of your physical, mental, and social limits. But also update your map. Apply Bayesian thinking: use new data, revise old conclusions. Don’t just protect the wound. Ask if it still needs protecting.

    Learn from others when you can. It takes guts and some of your own pain to be able to listen to other’s wisdom. Read biographies. Study people you admire and those you can’t stand. They show you the range of human possibility. But in the end, the version of truth that matters is the one you earn.

    Just don’t forget: pain is a powerful teacher, but it’s also a biased one. The lesson might not be universal. It might not even still be true. Your job is to keep learning and not let the scar rewrite your future.

    Flo

  • Build Your Life Like It Matters

    Build Your Life Like It Matters

    I once poured years of my life into an athlete and treated him like family. I believed in his talent more than he did. I optimized every detail: his training, recovery, mindset, even life stuff he never asked for help with. I thought if I just gave enough, he’d finally see it. That he’d shift from chasing short-term highs to building something that could last.

    He never did.

    He made the same mistakes over and over. Self-sabotage, shortcuts, lies. There was always a new excuse, a new crisis, a new way to avoid the long game. In the end, I had to let him go, not because I didn’t care, but because I finally realized: you can hand someone the blueprint, but you can’t make them build the house.

    That moment taught me something: optimization means nothing without ownership. Long-term thinking only works when you actually think long-term, for yourself.

    Long-Term Thinking = the Foundation of Ownership

    The joy of long-term thinking is that it gives you clarity. You sit down, reflect, and align your actions with the life you actually want to build, not the one you’re reacting to.

    When you do this seriously, it doesn’t just lead to better plans, it leads to better morals, better habits, better decisions. You begin to realize that nobody wants to be broke, sick, or regretful. Most people want to feel healthy, fulfilled, joyful, and connected. But the price? Few are willing to pay it.

    Long-term thinking helps you reverse engineer the price of your dreams. You set the vision, and then trace it back to the habits, mindset, and systems required today. That’s why I believe it’s one of the most powerful tools for taking ownership over your life.

    The Presence Trap vs. True Living

    But there’s a trap I’ve seen and fallen into myself. When you go all-in on optimization, you can forget to live.

    Being present doesn’t mean making reckless short-term decisions. It means living consciously, even while making disciplined moves toward the long game. The athlete I mentioned in the beginning? He was always “in the moment”, but not in the good way. He lived in reaction mode. Never slowed down enough to zoom out. Never learned. Never changed.

    Through Becca and life itself, I’ve learned that presence doesn’t mean letting go of direction. It means learning to enjoy the process while walking it. Long-term thinking doesn’t kill presence. It anchors it.

    My Framework – The PRO Playbook

    This is why I created the PRO Playbook for Kona Endurance. Not to just help people train harder or “optimize” better, but to help them master the actual art of living. To build:

    • A body that can handle life
    • A mind that can handle stress
    • And a system that aligns with long-term goals

    We don’t rise to the level of our motivation, we fall to the level of our systems. And if your system isn’t built with your deepest values in mind, you’ll end up somewhere you don’t want to be. More on the PRO playbook soon.

    Don’t Just Plan It. Live It.

    Planning is essential, but overplanning is a disguise. You can build the perfect social media presence, portfolio, company or whatever you are chasing and still be emotionally bankrupt. You can chase the dream and miss the whole point.

    Life doesn’t measure success by how many zeros are in your bank account, how many people follow you or by how many races you won, or even how optimized your routine is. At the end of the road, it seems to come down to something much simpler: Who’s with you when the lights go out?

    I know I’m biased. I believe part of life’s meaning comes from helping others and improving the world around us. But when I read biographies, study history, or listen to people reflecting on their lives, whether they succeeded wildly or lost everything, it’s the same themes that surface again and again: genuine human connection, inner peace, and living by values that feel solid.

    That doesn’t mean you have to follow the crowd. Clear thinking often requires going against it. But goodness: real, grounded goodness, seems to be the quiet thread that ties everything worthwhile together.

    Leaning into that love, into that integrity, won’t just help you reach your goals. It makes the process of getting there feel whole.

    Build Your Life Like It Matters…

    The Timeless Way of Building taught me: Great structures feel alive.
    They’re built on patterns that last, not fads, not hacks, not shortcuts.

    Life is the same. A well-built life has rhythm. Space to breathe. A soul.

    The soul of performance isn’t about intensity, it’s about grace. Patience. The courage to build something that matters. That means taking bold steps forward. Embracing risk. And just as importantly, letting go of what no longer serves the foundation.

    That part can hurt.

    Letting go of that athlete after years of pouring into him was one of the harder things I’ve ever done. But it was also the final gift I could offer him, a clean slate which hopefully opened his eyes.

    Your values are the soil you build in. Get those right, and everything else: your relationships, your work, your health; has something solid to root into.

    Taking ownership doesn’t mean controlling everything. It means committing to the path. It means choosing to build with intention.

    You don’t need to have it all figured out.
    But you do need to take ownership of the direction you’re heading in.

    Reflect deeply.
    Plan wisely.
    Live fully.
    Love well.

    Build your life like it matters. Because it does.

    Flo

    www.konaendurance.com

  • How to learn

    How to learn

    The hardest part of retiring from being a pro athlete was realizing how underutilized my brain had been. Besides the identity crisis, obviously. But learning became my way out. My general knowledge base was lagging due to years of hyperfocus on my niche. While this helped me make a living in sport, it also left me feeling vulnerable to challenges in the real world. I needed to catch up—fast.

    Luckily, I was never the most talented athlete. Hard work was always my edge. That same grind mindset became my greatest asset when it came to learning. Here’s how I approach it:

    1. Stress + Rest = Adaptation

    I try to dedicate up to three hours of high-concentration work to problem-solving and learning. Anything beyond that, and the quality of my learning declines. But everyone is different. I treat these three hours almost like a race – I give it my all. Then, I rest and prepare for the next session. I’m utilizing what I learned in endurance sports. You can only adapt and get better if you set the right stressors and give yourself enough rest to adapt.

    2. Find the bottleneck

    Identify the one problem that, if solved, will have the biggest impact. Work on that question and feed it to your brain. Think about it before you do mundane tasks like cleaning, showering or sitting on the toilet and let your subconscious mind work on it too. Important side note: don’t distract yourself with social media or other unimportant things, so your mind can fully wander. And physical movement helps: walks, farm work, or whatever clears your head. Direction matters. Don’t get distracted by minor details, focus on what will create the biggest breakthrough.

    3. Don’t fool yourself

    Once we learn something that works, we tend to stick with it. Even if it stops working. I learned that one from old coaches whose methods were stuck in the past and never evolved. How do we avoid this? This is hard. Don’t be lazy and stay dynamic. Question yourself and your methods and implement honesty as your own safeguard. Be intellectually honest with yourself and avoid the smallest lie to foster this honesty mindset.

    4. Learn universal principles

    My stubbornness helped me to figure out this one. I could either blindly follow orders or I can learn how things work and be my own master. We as humans are wired for routine, which can make us lazy. Keeping an open mind and learning the biggest principles from other fields will help us to connect the dots and see the world in a different light. This also helps with novel problem solving. That reminds me of the famous quote: “Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.” The goal is not just learning things but learning how to learn.

    5. Pain is a great teacher – learn from others

    Some of my biggest mistakes became my biggest opportunities for growth. This is classic value investor thinking—buy high-value assets when they’re undervalued and watch them grow.

    The same applies to life. When something bad happens like divorce, loss or failure, double down and make yourself even more valuable. Pain is an incredible teacher. If you burn your hand on the stove, you won’t do it again. Use this pain to learn and become better. Life happens to all of us: divorce, dramatic events, death. It’s how we utilize these moments and pains that will make a difference.

    Here’s the really interesting part, this is something I’m still working on too. You can learn from others with the same intensity and this is where I utilize empathy, visualization and logic. To understand how Charlie Munger developed such a prudent financial mindset I looked at his life and his pains that triggered him to learn. I then visualize myself in his shoes and connect my own painful experiences with his learning. By tapping into the painful lessons of others, you can accelerate your own learning without needing to live through every hardship yourself.

    6. Do the work

    Comfort is the most addictive drug. Why keep on pushing if you are number 1? Well, it’s not about the others; it’s about you. Take on hard tasks that push your limits because that’s the way you become better. Read books that are beyond your current level, try to get into things you find fascinating but that seem out of reach. Keep on pushing and growing no matter how good you think you are. Learning compounds amazingly well.

    Like all things, even learning can become an obsession. But for now, it’s the best addiction I could ask for.

    Flo

  • Reflections on 2024: Growth, and Perspective

    Reflections on 2024: Growth, and Perspective

    At the beginning of this year, I would have never guessed how much my perspective would shift. I was deeply immersed in learning, strategizing, planning 10-20 years ahead. And I still love that—it keeps my brain engaged in a useful way. But what I was missing was the now. I thought that if I wanted to be successful, I couldn’t afford to fully live in the present. That was a mistake.

    Then, life threw me into the fire of experience. I lost my partner and met incredible people, saw life from new perspectives, and realized that embracing the moment doesn’t mean losing sight of the future—it means making the journey itself richer. Now, combining that presence with the discipline that has carried me so far feels like unlocking a new level of life. The balance between planning and presence is where true freedom lies.

    So here’s my perspective right now:

    • Choose love over fear.
    • Live in the moment.
    • Stay disciplined to achieve freedom.

    Good Judgment and the Good Life

    Good judgment isn’t about being right in the moment—it’s about structuring life so that it aligns with what truly matters in the long run. Wise people know this. They understand that life isn’t a rough draft with endless revisions. They prioritize what is meaningful, even when the world tells them otherwise.

    Sometimes, the cost of being wise is appearing foolish to others. People who chase status, fleeting validation, or instant gratification will never understand the person who plays the long game. The person who invests in relationships, health, knowledge, and fulfillment.

    Developing good judgment starts with two questions:

    1. What do I want in life?
    2. Is what I want actually worth wanting?

    If the second question isn’t answered honestly, no amount of decision-making strategy will matter. There’s no value in being excellent at chasing the wrong goals.

    The Art of Living with Intention

    As this year unfolded, I found myself drawn deeper into the question: What do I truly want out of life? Not in an abstract, idealistic way, but in a way that demanded real answers—answers that would shape my decisions, my energy, and my presence. And the list that emerged was clear:

    1. Build a happy, loving family.
    2. Achieve financial independence.
    3. Expand my knowledge as broadly as possible.
    4. Use my freedom to explore and enjoy life fully.
    5. Don’t let pain win—find peace within myself.
    6. Make the world a better place, leaving it better than I found it.
    7. Create space for humans to be seen and understood.
    8. Support my parents through their final chapter with forgiveness and care.
    9. Find beauty in the world, in moments, in people.

    This list didn’t come from theory but from lived experience. Some lessons came gently, others through fire. But all were valuable.

    Learning to Forgive—Myself and Others

    The past few weeks have been all about learning to forgive—both others and myself. I’ve realized that empathy isn’t just about understanding someone’s pain or motivations; it’s also about recognizing that holding onto resentment is just another form of self-punishment. Forgiveness isn’t about excusing actions; it’s about setting down the weight we carry.

    At 13, I left home to train at an Olympic facility, believing it was the best thing for me. And in many ways, it was. But returning home that Christmas to the news of my parents’ divorce changed something in me. Over the years, the distance grew, making it harder to reconnect. It’s easy to blame, easy to see only our side of things. But stepping back, I now see the struggles my father faced—growing up in Eastern Germany, having to rebuild his life after the Berlin Wall fell. Recognizing those struggles doesn’t erase the pain, but it does help me break the cycle.

    Forgiving others is one thing. Forgiving ourselves is another. I’ve reached a point where I can extend grace outward, but now I’m working on giving it inward. And that’s where true peace begins.

    My Current Self-Improvement Stack

    Growth isn’t just about learning—it’s about applying what we learn. Here’s what I’m focusing on:

    • Continuous Learning: Reading advanced books, taking challenging courses.
    • Critical Thinking: Playing bridge, solving puzzles, engaging in deep analysis.
    • Creative Projects: Exploring new creative hobbies, innovating in storytelling.
    • Practical Skills: Hands-on DIY projects, real-world problem-solving.
    • Emotional Intelligence: Practicing mindfulness, deepening empathy.
    • Physical Health: Staying active, training wisely, eating well.
    • Language Skills: Learning new languages and memory techniques.
    • Interdisciplinary Studies: Exploring philosophy, neuroscience, and systems thinking.
    • Social Skills: Getting out of the house more and saying yes to adventures and opportunities when they come up.

    Each of these areas isn’t just about skill-building; it’s about becoming—becoming more resilient, more insightful, more effective in life.

    Closing Thoughts

    2024 was a year of shifts. Of realizing that success isn’t a future state but a way of living now. Of forgiving, not because others always deserve it, but because I deserve the peace it brings. Of balancing discipline with presence. Of choosing the long-term path while still saying yes to life as it unfolds.

    I don’t know what 2025 will bring. But I do know this: I’ll meet it with open hands, a clear mind, and a full heart.